A MAN WITH CAHOONAS

I HAVE TO SAY HONESTLY PEOPLE ARE REALLY TRYING TO PUSH MY BUTTONS!LAST NIGHT I WENT OUT,AGAINST MY BETTER JUDGEMENT AND OF COURSE A DRUNKEN IDIOT HAD TO RUIN THE NIGHT! 1ST HE WAS INVADING SPACE, 2ND) IMPLYING THAT I AM RACIST BECAUSE I DONT HAVE AN INTEREST IN BLACK GUYS PER- SAY 3RD)IMPLY THAT BLACK GUYS DONT DRIVE 4) TO CALL ME A RACIST BUT TURNS AROUND AND TRIES TO START TROUBLE WITH A WHITE FRIEND OF MINE.. WELL I HAD  ENOUGH AT THAT POINT AND DECIDED TO PUT HIM IN HIS PLACE(HOWEVER I WAS THE ONE THAT WAS WRONG) BECAUSE HE WAS DRUNK ,AND I WAS SUPPOSED TO COWARD OUT ...ITS NOT IMPORTANT PEOPLE WERE SAYING ,CALM DOWN....WTF   SOME PEOPLE NEED TO BE TAUGHT A LESSON ESPECIALLY WHEN THERE WERE PREVIOUS PROBLEMS WITH THE GUY BEING KICKED OUT OF THE BAR..SOMETIMES PEOPLE DONT LEARN UNTIL THERE IS A FOOT IN THEIR BROWN EYE!

I HAVE TO SAY THAT MY PATIENCE IS VERY THIN! VERY THIN!

THE PROBLEM WITH QUITE A FEW GAY MEN I THINK FEEL THAT THEY ARE WEAK,THEY HAVE A DICK BUT NO BALLS!WELL THEY MAY AS WELL HAVE A VAGINA..

ITS FAR BETTER TO SPEAK UP THAN COWER OUT!

ANYWAYS THE NIGHT DID GET BETTER AFTER I CALMED DOWN A BIT AND THE WORK DAY TODAY WAS DESCENT

I AM TIRED  I DIGRESS

Off Day

Well its lunchtime and i have barely moved i guess thats why they call it a day off LOL However i think i am going to get myself motivated and at least walk to the store for Fish oil,I hear this is good for your health and ur heart.With that being said  i also need to work out  a solid plan for getting The Manor Done ,,,Ugh it kinda sucks when you are limited on funds.Pretty soon i will have to sell my ass on the streets in order to raise money*Sigh*but as the saying goes where there's a will there's a way right? The crazy thing is i do have some friends that have the know how and whatnot but getting everybody together to deliver on what they say they will help me with is challenging in itself.Oh well i will figure it out soon enough i think and i hope    I digress    Showertime

Ramble Time

Here it is the Fall already and I am settling in to a quiet evening at home with a cup of hot chocolate and my favorite tv show love it or list it...I have made a change in stores since the last time i blogged and I definately had made a change for the better.It has helped me think alot more positive about work and that helps me alot mentally.I am still keeping options open by all means but i am also satisfied as well.Now the personal stuff......I am bowling again *which i thought i wouldnt do again* but thanks to my friend Tim he convinced me to do it and so far i love it..I am working on great new friendships,keeping old ones and just loving that too.I guess thats why i dont blog as much anymore because when i originally started i had alot of issues to work thru.I think i should start blogging about the good stuff too it only makes sense...I ramble but thats what a blog is for  I digress

Sunday Morning

Well here it is another end to another weekend and I am a little tired but i had a great time.I realize every weekend how blessed i am.I love being with friends ,cultivating friendships,and making new friends.Now i have to decide what to do for today.Actually i think that Jayson and Jason are coming to see me before they head off to Erie to start a new chapter in their lives.I actually think i need a new chapter as well or at least turn the pages so that i can get to the next chapter whatever that may be.I know that my Home is a big part of a New Chapter and that where a main part of my focus should be....Also I need a new Career..This one just doesnt do it for me anymore.I really feel i have lost the part of me that made me one of the Best Managers,*Which is I am not nice anymore* I feel the need to be a Bitch before i am actually nice to someone and that is so not cool and i know it! ..My David has thrown out some options of career choices *Paths i can travel* so i need to make some decisions.

LIfe is strange

It has been awhile since my last post (once again) I really havent had anything to complain about ,but i guess one would say well why dont you write when there are good things happening? I would agree with that..I have been making things happen..I have been increasing the number of friends i have,Charmed manor is coming along as i become more focused,Vince and I have move to a new store front/apartment.I have to figure out my next move for employment tho...its the last thing that is really holding me back...anyways oh i forgot a few negative things did happen to me over these past few weeks   I had to replace a fuel pump in the car and then after i had it back for a week   i was out at the bar and someone through a brick through my passenger window,Sigh but inspite..inspite i kept a very cool head about the whole thing.I actually puzzled my friends that i was so calm...i am growing mentally,and i contribute that to having supportive friends and Vince.I have to admit i love this new apartment with the exception of parking its very relaxing.....i have slept so much better since being here...Well i am going to say   I digress

Whirlwind weekend

I honestly have to say it was one hell of a weekend,after finishing up a long 51 hour work week...Christmas eve was spent with Vince and his family and then Christmas morning much to my surprise we received devastating news...my moms best friend passed away overnight.It was so heartbreaking to see my mom so upset.It is horrible to lose a best friend,I really just had started to get to know her so well after spending lunch with her and my mom everyday.So Christmas weekend wasnt as enjoyable as it could have been.I miss her already,lunch wasnt the same without her laughing with us .I could still hear her voice and her laugh.She is still that alive in my heart and head.I cant believe we just had lunch together friday afternoon..SO sad.I just hope she wasnt in pain when she went home to god.I hope that her sons can find peace in knowing they had a great mom .I think i have wrote enough for now because i am starting to feel emotional     I digress

Charmed Manor

Well i have to admit so many changes have been happening at such a fast pace its hard to keep up.The holidays are here,I have my house (Charmed Manor) to work on and my mind is just spinning in 50 different directions.  I never expected to have my house back after fucking up so bad and just walking away from it ,unfortunately now I have 2 yrs of catching up to do ...I am really coming down so hard on myself because i let it get to the point where i trusted people to do right by me and that didnt happen...But however now i am back and getting better than ever strong willed and never making the same mistakes again...I actually cant wait to put the holidays to rest so i can do what i have to do to get myself motivated to rebuild Charmed Manor...